Anybody out there remember biorythm, i think it was called? If memory serves (which, after single-handedly wiping out an entire mexican town’s agave crop, is questionable, at best) it had to do with recognizing the patterns in your life that were, to oversimplify, either up, or down. When your personal biorythm is up, you schedule stuff like interviews, sales calls, dates, etc. When it is down, you stock up on movies and cheese puffs and stay your ass at home. I need to find that book, and re-read it. If i ever did read it. I’ve become convinced that it has merit, this idea, that cycles emerge in our lives when stuff clicks, or it doesn’t. True, the New-agers among us might say it’s a matter of aligned chakras, and my stoner friend that reads the stars would say my personal planets are aligned, or not. Have you, like me, ever wondered what it’s like having your palm read, or tea leaves, or whatever? There are a half-dozen places that offer this near me, but I grew up fearing gypsies, and i think this is their turf. Anyway, i’m convinced that i do indeed have these cycles, and perhaps yesterday was proof of that. All I know is, there are days when everyone i talk do, or inter-act with comes away thinking i am all “that”, as my daughter says. Cashiers are friendly, i get superb service, i can even convince a store manager that i am in fact entitled to that refund, or discount. Women swoon. Men admire. Dogs and cats flock to me, and my car finds the perfect parking spot.
Then, the cycle goes the other way, and i couldn’t get laid in a whorehouse. No matter how pure my intentions, I’m misunderstood. It’s a little like that guy in the GPS commercial that tells the guy he has GPS, and the guy standing outside his window says, “what did you call me?”. I swear, on those days, i could hand a complete stranger a 20 spot and somehow have it misconstrued as, i don’t know, condecension? Now, it’s not that i can’t take the bad with the good, i have no complaints with this life, i am indeed blessed, up or down, but here is where i think it would be handy to be able to spot bad days in advance. Yesterday, i had a meeting with a new friend, someone i didn’t know well, but that i liked a great deal, and part of me wanted to impress this person. Apparently, though they won’t admit it, i asked an inapprproiate question, or, i was less than diplomatic or tactful when attempting to solicit more info from them, and i believe i hurt their feelings. I’d sooner be forced to listen to Steve Gill for 24 straight hours than hurt a friend’s feelings. i know i am a tad insensitive sometimes, maybe that comes out on the low cycle….all i know is, i’m going to see if Amazon has that book anymore, and then call my friend and apologize….